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Saturday, March 11, 2017

5 Theme Parks Kids Are NOT Allowed To Visit!

Theme parks are great places for having fun and making longtime memories with friends and family. These theme parks are great for making different kinds of memories, though. Whether you’re looking for something a little dirty with other consenting adults, or looking for some clean fun in a no kids zone, these are 5 theme parks kids are not allowed to visit! Let’s begin!

5.) Jeju Loveland

People in mainland Asia seem to view theme parks differently than the rest of the world does. Jeju Loveland is a sculpture park in South Korea, where visitors can explore a garden of different erotic art covering a variety of mediums and styles. While most of the art is traditional including depictions of genitals or sexual acts, some of it interactive, including a “masturbation cycle” and interactive exhibits that simulate sex. The park opened in 2004, can be explored in an hour, and most of the exhibits were created by college students in 2002 although some exhibits do rotate. For couples with children looking for a kinky little day trip, there is a separate play area where children can wait for their parents. Then the parents will just need somewhere to send them while they’re in the hotel room.

4.) Dig This, Las Vegas

Not every thing for adults has to be sexy or inebriating. Dig This in Las Vegas is a theme park for adults that’s basically a real life, life sized sandbox where people can play with toy trucks like they did when they were a kid - but these are the real kind. People can visit Dig This and play with the numerous giant earth moving machines, including a bulldozer, excavator, mini excavator, and skid steer. After a sobriety test and a training course, visitors typically do what you would ordinarily do with this equipment, such as digging trenches, building mounds. There are other activities including a teeter totter and “bucket basketball,” with a recess period where visitors can just do what they want in giant construction equipment. Oh, you can also shoot guns.

3.) La Cite Du Vin

La Cite Du Vine, or the City of Wine, is a wine themed museum in Bordeaux, France. While there aren’t a lot of rides in the City of Wine, you will find a lot of wine and information about wine. The City of Wine offers wine tasting, art, tours, workshops, and classes, in a gigantic, modern, beautiful building that overlooks the Bordeaux region of France. You get all that for just 20 Euros, or 21 USD. Once you’ve finished all of the tours and exhibits, there are a number of bars and restaurants where you can drink even more and spoil yourself with French food. It’s probably the classiest thing you can do without kids while on vacation, and probably even classier than most thing you can do in France.

2.) BH Mallorca

BH Mallorca is an adults only resort and water park in Spain that offers shows, food, a beach club, and perhaps the most archetypical European Spring Break vacation that could ever exist. BH Mallorca is like a water park on MDMA. BH Mallorca labels itself the world’s first adult water park with 9 giant water slides where guests can reach speeds up to 60 km/hr, two giant jacuzzis, and a wave pool. Located on the Spanish island of Majorca which sits in the Mediterranean, BH Mallorca is basically everything you might imagine a college vacation being, with live shows, parties every day, and an artistic style that has a lot of pastel and neon colors for when you drop your bean.

1.) Erotikaland

The creators of Erotikaland are calling it the Disneyland of sex. Erotikaland is set to open near Sao Paolo, Brazil in 2018, and will be a sex theme park with phallic bumper cars, a nudist swimming pool, and aphrodisiacs. Despite how it may sound, you’re not meant to actually have sex in the park - the park is like the cheeky foreplay that gets you ready. Any actual sexual activity is meant to take place in the nearby hotel they’re also building, and the park is meant to be a nonsex zone. While some Brazilians believe that Erotikaland will only bring prostitution and sex tourists to the area, the park’s creator believes that it will create jobs for the city and educate visitors about safe sex. Who knows how a premium, adults only sex theme park in Brazil will turn out?

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